Echo 4 ....we have a call

Good Morning all from a miserable Glasgow. The feeling of saddness mixed with relief and worry (i just saw my bank statements and phone bill) are lingering in the air.

Standing in Jo'burg airport.....I was thankful for my Vicky Beckham Glasses!!The tears just kept flowing down my face and I had mascara running everywhere and I couldnt make it into the bathroom due to the stupid luggage trolley.

Leaving South Africa was harder than I ever imagained it would be. It was very strange; I was so upset, so sad...and yet I wasn't saying goodbye to anything in particular.I didn't have to say goodbye to anybody or leave any place in particular, i was just gutted to leave the summer and all of its experiences behing. At the same time, I secretly wondered was I crying as I knew reality was getting nearer and frankly, reality is not good; debt, studying, final exams, rainy weather, no vineyards, no crazy theatre experiences and again I will repeat finals.....as this carrys a fear of impending doom. However, on the other hand, it is great to be home to see everyone, catch up and get stuck back in to reality. I suppose on one hand, the sooner the exams are over, the sooner I can concentrate on being free, and starting out as a doctor and consider going back to south africa for another dose of sunshine and experiences.

I think in one way, finishing in Jo'burg was a bad idea.It was so good...it made leaving a hundred times harder. On the other hand, it also made me leave desperately wanting to come back for more as soon as possible.

Tuesday Morning, 5am.
Start of air ambulance shift.
Grand central airport; jo'burg

12pm. Paramedic says, "okay i am going to order lunch. i promise you as soon as we do, we will get a call.

12.15pm. Echo 4.......we have a call

12.25pm. Okay, everyone okay in the back? Seatbelts fastened, headsets on, prepare for take off.........and we are off
Control from echo 4 we have just left grand central airport currently heading northbound towards the scene of the accident. ETA 20mins. That is an ETA of 20mins

.........................I mean at this point I am sitting in this helicopter thinking, "OH MY JESUS.We are actually going to a real sick trauma patient...and i actually have to help!!!!!"

Eventually after 20mins....we spotted the red flashing lights from the air, the upside down car, the marks on the road......and a body lying approximetly 60metres from the car itself.

A landing spot was picked on the road, traffic cleared.....and Echo 4 parked itself perfectly in the middle of the motorway, avoiding all electricity wires on the way down. (thankfully)

We got out...with proper helicopter air...and ran to the scene to find a young man with polytrauma. He was seriously injured and so it was intubated on scene and a number of other procedures were carried out on scene. Luckily I was able to make myself someway useful and carried out my jobs and procededed to take over bagging the patient whilst the doctor continued assessing. After 13 mins on scene, we brought the patient back to the helicopter, (cue for more helicopter hair) and loaded the patient. Following 20mins airbourne, we landed in Bara Trauma unit, Soweto. All I can say is , "unbelievable". Honestly. Unreal. There were people lying everywhere!!Trolleys scattered all over the floor, blood splattered on the walls and people just walking around with massive gapping holes and wounds. It was certainly an eye opener.

On our return flight back to grand central airport, the pilot flew over the new stadium for the world cup. I must admit, a privilged view that not many people will ever see. It looks amazing!

Unfortunately before i knew it, 3.30pm was on the clock and my taxi was waiting to drop me back to International airport for my final voyage. I must say, I had such a lump in my throat as I took the blue stinking scrubs off for my last time. My little red name badge from Stellenbosch university was unpinned and they were all folded away into the bag for the final time.

Dr Hattingh carried my bags out, and I said my final goodbyes and thank yous. I really could not express to him how thankful I was. I wanted to hug him/climb on top of him/never leave go....but i figured I could be arrested for that.I opted for a firm handshake to demonstrate my gratitude. Hopefully it worked.

As I got into the taxi,I just started balling and the taxi man thought it was halarious. He kept just telling me how I could come back and not to try and how I was a great advert for SA. However, it did not help; i was properly gutted. That pit in your stomach, that melancholic feeling and it was all tainted by the impending doom of the final exams that lie ahead.

All I can say is it was undoubtedly the highlight of my 23 years. I still can't really figure out how or why I was so priviliged to fly. I do not know why these people that I owe nothing too have gone out of there way to really make my summer unreal. When i watch the video clip that I took from the air, only then do i realise it was actually all real, and just not some amazing dream.

I have to say, (although I know this happened when i did HEMS in London) I do love emergency medicine. I KNOW that it carries a huge amount of baggage with it, and it really isn't the easy option, but then again what is the easy medical option? Obviously I can hear you all screaming "GP??"".....but I dont know if it really is the "easy" option. For me I think it is the safe option. 9-5, very little on call, nice lunch breaks and weekends off.... But would it make me happy??I don't think so!I really try and pretend it might. I try to convience myself all the time that I would like to become a gp or go for something in surgery, but when it comes down to it.......NOTHING compares to the excitement and the enjoyment(in a non sadistic way if possible) that i get from emergency medicine. I just love it!To be fair though, this year alone I have spent 5 weeks with London HEMS, flew with the navy's seaking helicopter to transfer a patient,completed my pre-hospital care course with the royal college of surgeons, did 4 weeks of trauma surgery in cape town, spent 2 days FLYING with Jo'burg HEMS and then 10 weeks of emergency medicine here in Glasgow. I do not know why I try and convience myself that I dont want to do it.....cause it is sort of the elephant in the room like isnt it?!

However, admittedly, I felt like this when I came back from HEMS in London. Emergency medicine was all i wanted to do. Again on returning from this amazing summer, I feel the same. Mabye I will change my mind........watch this space.......!

For now, I must go. I have a tonne of washing to do and some bills to sort out, and a leg wax to book and prepare myself mentally for. (however, i have decided that i am going to pop some co-codamol before i go. Beauty is pain and no, it really is not worth it)

So for now, far well. Will put up some pictures soon and also fill you all in about Botswana and Zimbabwe.

xxxxxx